Have you entered the storehouses of the snow...Job 38:22

Thursday, February 4, 2010

WAIT!

I am waiting for more snow. I am waiting for my husband to decide whether we are traveling to the other end of the state. I am waiting for an interview for an EdD program. There will come a point when this waiting will be over.

I am waiting for direction from God. I am waiting for a vowel. (See here to understand why a vowel.) I despair that I will ever get that vowel.

I wait a lot. It seems that one of the words that describe my life is wait. No this isn’t the spiritual waiting upon the Lord so my strength is renewed. Nor is it a quiet expectation like when one waits for the birth of a child. With the birth of a child, you know you are pregnant. You know that a life is inside of you. You know it will come out and give you great joy. You know that the waiting has purpose.

Today a dear friend told me that I need to wait. She confessed that waiting is hard for her as well. I wanted to hear her candid advice. I trust her. When a good friend speaks, one that you know has your best interest at heart, one that also loves the Lord, you need to listen. Often the voice of God comes through these words.
I wanted to nicely remind my friend that she is young and I am not. She is not so young that she is immature; she is old enough to have wise advice. It is just that I know that what I thought in my 30’s is not what I think now. I feel an urgency. When I was younger, I thought I had time. I am tired of waiting.

Ten years ago, I felt like the girl who was all ready for prom, she has the dress, she has the shoes, her hair done, make-up perfect and she is sitting on the couch wondering if her date will ever come. I’m still on the couch. My appearance older, my dress wrinkled and tears stain my perfect make-up.


This morning I am waiting. I am waiting for spring. There is always a spring to follow a winter. If I were a gardener, I would be looking at seed catalogs getting ready to plant. I’d go to the store to buy peat pots and soil. I’d take little tiny seeds, plant them, water, then watch for tiny flecks of green to come out of the black soil. I’d be anticipating the taste of a tomato, or sweet corn.

In the second grade they taught us about planting. In our used milk cartons, we’d plant marigolds.  With great expectation we’d look each day for that first fleck of green. It always came. They always grew. The buds appeared. With luck, a burst of orange or yellow would exclaim Happy Mother’s Day just in time.

I’ve been looking at a seed catalog. I was planting my seeds in the soil of the seminary. They aren’t growing well.  I’m considering a different place to plant my seeds. I can’t do anything else but plant and wait.

I don’t know when my spring will come. I guess I don’t know if my spring will really come. Nevertheless, spring does always follow winter. Today on this day as I await more snow, I am waiting for spring. This waiting is based on hope.  While I see nothing, I know I have planted. I know I have watered. My hope is that something green will appear. It is that unseen hope in the God who is faithful.



3 comments:

  1. Hmm...is it that the frustration felt in waiting and the impatience for SOMETHING to happen could be the swelling of the seeds that happens below the surface, before the sprout, before the breaking of the surface? I'm liking this analogy. The seed must be nourished and strengthened to burst forth, to be bold enough to face the elements and the landscape, to escape confinement and fulfill their purpose become what they were designed to be. But waiting, dormancy - it is not easy. It SEEMS that nothing is happening. Over the years in the small rural community outside Nashville, I have been watching this process of winter to spring, and I have found myself articulating to the congregation, 'isn't it wonderful how God is renewing the earth right now?' Yes, they look at me like I'm crazy too.
    I'm glad we're friends, even if I am only starting to understand the pressure of time! :)

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  2. I'm glad we are friends too. I like that word dormancy - gives a different perspective to the wait.

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  3. Here is a shortened version of a sermon I gave, mainly about God being in the midst of everything, but we have to be "entwined with HIm' in the process to make it through.

    O Taste and See that The Lord (our God) is good! … Blessed ( happy fortunate to be envied is the man who trusts and takes refuge in Him.
    (1 Peter 2;2,3)

    Help God- Where are you? What are you doing? I can’t see you, feel you, touch you….. Are you there?

    In those times of testing and trials, is God there? Is He really there? Has he left you? No of course not.. let me show you….Trust and refuge are the two key words in the scripture.

    Psalm 103; Bless Affectionately gratefully praise The Lord, O my soul; and all that is (deepest) within me, bless His holy name!
    2 Bless ( affectionately gratefully praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not ( one of) His benefits
    3 Who forgives (every one of ) all your iniquities, Who heals ( each one of ) all your diseases.
    4 Who redeems your life from the pit and corruption, Who beautifies, dignifies and crowns you with loving kindness and tender mercy. – (Where do you put a crown… on your head)
    5 Who satisfies your mouth ( your necessity and desire at your personal age and situation) with good so that your youth, renewed, is like the eagle’s ( strong, overcoming, soaring)!

    Isaiah 40:28 -31 Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, The Lord the Creator of the ends of the earth does not faint or grow weary; there is no searching of His understanding. 29 He gives power to the faint and weary, and to him who has no might He increases strength ( causing it to multiply and making it to abound)
    11Cor 2;9 30 Even youths shall faint and be weary and ( selected) young men shall feebly stumble and fall exhausted. 31 But those who wait for the Lord ( who expect, look for, and Hope in Him) shall change and renew their strength and power; they shall lift their wings and mount up ( close to God) as eagles (mount up to the sun); they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint or become tired. ( Heb 12;1-3)

    **wait 6960 to bind together by twisting to gather(together), look patiently, tarry, wait (upon, for)

    He is in our midst. His Love endures forever…. He wants to love you today……. To let you know when you say “Help God! Where are you.” You will know that He is in the midst of every situation, because He loves you.

    He will never leave you nor forsake you…. He is in the midst of your trial, He is in the midst of your situation, in there with you… He has not gone, He will never go, never leave, never never, never… because He loves you, you are His child, His precious daughter, His precious jewel,He wants to make you into the Image of His Son, but He went through many tests and trials, He went through betrayal, rejection, grief, He had to face Death on a Cross, He took on all our sin, all our sickness, and all our diseases, on the Cross at Calvary, He paid the price that we may be free to have eternal life…. Jesus went back to be with the Father, but He said He would not leave us as orphans, He left us the Comforter, The Holy Spirit here on Earth to comfort us, lead us, guide us, live within us…

    WE NEED TO HAVE PEACE IN THE MIDST OF TRIAL AND TROUBLE, ANCHORED TO THE SAVIOUR-GROUNDED IN HIS LOVE.
    7) BE STILL AND REST IN THE LORD, WAIT FOR HIM AND PATIENTLY LEAN YOURSELF UPON HIM; FRET NOT YOURSELF BECAUSE OF HIM WHO PROSPERS IN HIS WAY, BECAUSE OF THE MAN WHO BRING WICKED DEVICES TO PASS BUT THE MEEK (IN THE END) SHALL INHERIT THE EARTH AND SHALL DELIGHT THEMSELVES IN THE ABUNDANCE OF PEACE

    **PSALM 91.1 HE WHO DWELLS IN THE SECRET PLACE OF THE MOST HIGH SHALL REMAIN STABLE AND FIXED UNDER THE SHADOW OF THE ALMIGHTY (WHOSE POWER NO FOE CAN WITHSTAND)


    So those who wait upon The Lord will indeed rise up... so wait, be entwined with Him, His plan, His purpose and His Love and you will not grow weary, but in due season all will be revealed... Till then... trust and obey! Amen.

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