Rude People Annoy Me

It's been a while since I blogged anywhere. I haven't forgotten about blogging. I sort of miss it. However, my life has been consumed with a research project. I'm in the throws of a 100 entry annotated bibliography. I can tell you I am sleeping well at night after a day of boring reading. Oh, it's not that bad for a nerdy person like me but sometimes, I think, man, I'm too old for this.
There are so many good things I could write about these days. Life is much less dull. I have been told recently that I seem so alive these days. Another friend told me I am like a little girl. Maybe starting another school adventure has made me into a school girl again. I don't know but life is good. I am sure some of you who have read through this blog in the past are saying, "I don't believe she said that."
So it is with some reservation I have decided to write a blog of discontent again. I rather like the word, carping. I am going to carp about something. That something is, I miss manners.
Remember the old book "Everything I Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten?" I am sure there was something about excuse me, thank you, please, etc. I had a neighbor who was rather mean and stern when I was a child. Her name was Mrs. Ohman. There was none of the first name business in those days. And she wasn't one of the honorary "Aunts" or as in my neighborhood, "Tante" (Norwegian for Aunt). She was just MRS.
I would stay at her house sometimes as a kid when my mother was in the hospital or went away for something. She had a daughter a little bit older than I was, her name was Nancy. I've written about Nancy before when I confessed to playing "devil cards" in her basement. Mrs. Ohman made me do dishes when I was staying there. She also would correct me about my manners. She would look at me with a stern face and say, "What's the magic word(s)"? That would mean I forgot to say please, thank you, pardon me, excuse me, etc. It actually was good training. I tried to teach my children about manners.
A week or so ago a Facebook friend was lamenting in her status about manners too - she missed gentlemen. I replied and we exchanged comments. She seemed to want to blame women for not behaving like ladies thus causing men to behave badly. I thought that was a bit like saying that women behave badly and therefore it's okay for them to be abused. I know, that's a bit far. I am sure she didn't mean that.
Then we got into a short snippet discussion about power. I said something about using my power. She didn't seem to agree. I guess I came across as a feminist. It's okay. We just stopped commenting. She's still my Facebook friend.

So what triggered me today? A trip to Wal-Mart - that bastion of American capitalism. I don't know, something about a trip to Wal-Mart in South Dakota will always bring out the worst in me. I get tired of people who can't say excuse me. I wonder what has made people here so unfriendly and rude most of the time. But honestly, I am rather used to navigating my cart through the store and just not noticing the rudeness any more.
It was the clerk. It was the clerk and the woman in front of me that did it for me. The clerk's clumsiness knocked over one of my items and sent it to the floor. He was scanning the woman in front of me's artificial flowers. Between me and the item was my cart. The woman in front of me bent over and picked up the item throwing it on the belt. I said the magic words; I said "Thank you." That was greeted by that glare I've come so accustomed to here. Thank you? Is that a foreign word like excuse me? I looked at the clerk who was also look at me with a similar glare. I thought how rude! When he finally got to my items, he forgot the customary, how are you? Did you find everything today? etc. As he was scanning another friendly Wal-Mart associate walked by so they could exchange their scorning comments about working at Wal-Mart.
The bright spot was the greeter. As I walked by, the white haired woman had a genuine smile. I thought wow, one person in South Dakota who remembers her manners.
Okay, I know this isn't a big deal in the grand scheme of things. If you shop at Wal-Mart you know customer service sucks. I even decided to do the survey request for the $1000 on the receipt so I could complain. They gave me no chance to complain.
It isn't just Wal-Mart though, my farmer's market experience the other day was equally bad.
OHHHH I wish there were a Target here in Brookings. They train their employees on manners. I think it's needed. Oh well, back to research.

We're Back

I saw porta-pots. A friend reported that she saw them on a trip to Western South Dakota. Maybe someone read my blog!? I don't know why they have porta-pots now, but I am so glad.

However, the hospitality issue is still a problem. We had a wonderful amazing trip to Arizona this past weekend. The customer service and friendliness was noticeably wonderful. I already sent an email to the hotel where we stayed - it was a low-budget hotel too... so it wasn't that we paid big bucks for that hospitality.

We ate at Denny's twice. Both times the servers were polite, attentive, friendly - everything you want. I should send an email to Denny's about it too. I am like that. I may complain but I also try to compliment with the same zeal.

Arizona is not only a beautiful place but the people are great. We saw the Grand Canyon for the first time. It left me awestruck. I can't wait to go back and see it again. Check out our video here.

We visited the mission in Tucson again. There is something about that mission. It seems to replenish our souls. We prayed at the mission. We even lit a candle. It was a Maria Guadalupe one that we bought in honor of our granddaughter. We even paid our respects to St. Francis' image. Saw a beautiful little ceremony for a young girl. You can see a video of it here. We came home different people in many ways. I know I am more hopeful about the future.

Sadly we left Arizona on Monday. Service on Southwest Airlines was good as usual. We arrive very late in Omaha and decided to spend the night. Mistakenly we thought we'd save a few dollars and stayed at Motel 6. NEVER again. I realized that the extra $20 I would have had to spend to stay at a LaQuinta or other low-budget hotel would have been more than worth it. A quick breakfast at McDonald's in Omaha and off we went to back to South Dakota.

As soon as we got into South Dakota I did notice a porta-pot at a construction site. I was happy. Then we stopped at another McDonald's. This one was in South Dakota. I ordered a coffee. This time there was no smile. There was no "can I help you?" It was just a glare and a "here you go" when we got the coffee.

My husband and I just looked at each other, shrugged and said, "guess we're back in South Dakota." Today I had a less than enjoyable experience at Wal-Mart. No customer service there either... At McDonald's this morning I discovered that nearly every place else in the country will give you a large drink for a dollar. Here you get a small cup for a dollar.

Oh well, it's home for now. The day is beautiful. Some of the people I've met here are truly very nice people. They redeem the place for me. Next week I'll leave again and won't return for weeks. I'll drink all the sweet tea I want that is made right and only costs $1.

Escaping Cabin Fever at Wal-Mart

I went to Wal-Mart on Sunday. Considering I live in a town, where the only significant places to shop are Wal-Mart and HyVee a trip to Wal-Mart is not of any great interest. Nevertheless, this trip was interesting.

Usually I leave Wal-Mart or HyVee a bit miffed. It seems there is a lack of manners here. Either that or manners are different. I miss the excuse me’s and smiles when your “buggies” pass in the store. On a country road, I became accustom to a congenial wave from the pick-up truck that meets you.

I’ve long known this is all superficial but I was accustom to it and grew to like it. Last time I was wandering around Target in Nashville, someone smiled and said excuse me. It startled me. I thought oh my, please don’t let me lose my civility.

On Sunday, while I was wandering around Wal-Mart I was shocked again. Prepared to annoyed, I was surprised as a woman smile at me and said, “Excuse me.” I looked at my husband and whispered OMG she said excused me. Then another person smiled at me.

I bought some amazing fresh beets. The beets really don’t need to be added to this blog. I just want to tell you about them. Last night I had cooked beets with butter along with some barbecued chicken and some nasty rice. I wanted potato salad but thought that was pushing spring too much.  Besides the potatoes in my cabinet were filled with eyes and soft.  Leftover rice from the freezer was an unfitting substitute. Those beets were the star of the plate. Both my husband and I wanted more. I’m going to buy more today.

Beets are a winter vegetable. They store well like potatoes. Nonetheless, they remind me of summer picnics. My mother made great pickled beet. My Aunt Rachel introduced me to purple pickled eggs. Once convinced to taste them, I would beg for them. My childhood summers were filled with pickled beets, purple pickled eggs, potato salad and chicken, summer on a plate.

Maybe the beets do fit in this story. My experience of friendliness at Wal-Mart isn’t over.  I had navigated through Wal-Mart behind a large cat palm plant we found on clearance for $3.00. We came to the checkout with our plant. The clerk smiled. That too was a surprise. He said, looks like you are bringing spring. We need some spring!

He kept talking about spring. I guess like me, he was starved for green. Seeing the green reminded him that new life will soon emerge from the brown frozen ground. 

As he handed me my receipt and I said thank you, he said the most interesting thing. He said I’m going to tell everyone you brought spring. I’m going to remember you because you are bringing spring.  As we meandered through the puddles in the parking lot, my husband and I laughed. We wondered what had happened to us in Wal-Mart. He said I’ll bet you’ll blog about this. He was right. I said I’ll call it “escaping cabin fever at Wal-Mart.” I did.

What a strange beginning for a strange week. This week I have some important appointments. I have an appointment that may lead to the much desired, prayed for and sought after ministry as a Pastor. Could my call be fulfilled in South Dakota? I have another appointment concerning a doctoral program here in South Dakota. I will fill a pulpit this Sunday in a beautiful church that is filled with the most beautiful people I’ve met in the upper Midwest. I likely will also hear about the doctoral program in Nashville. It’s a strange week.

Maybe, just maybe, the glimmers of hope and acceptance that are springing up concerning life in South Dakota are what these people saw in Wal-Mart last Sunday.  Maybe as I embrace the hope of spring, it will be contagious.  Spring comes late in the Dakotas. Thankfully, it does come.  It will come for me as well.

Today I plan to go to HyVee. I am hoping their daffodils are in.